— Sir! Hey, sir!!! — someone’s yelling at me as I’m crossing the street.

I’m half lost in thoughts, half abstracted, walking down the nightly Prague like a robot. Off my way to buy chocolates.

— Sir?! Can you hear me? Come back please!

I’m turning my head slowly, seeing two coppers standing in front of a zebra, shouting at me. I’m slowly coming to face them, pretty sure what will happen next. Do I get what I’ve done? Have I seen the lights? I’m keeping mute; trying not to show any emotions, though it’s bubbling inside.

— Can I see your ID? — the copper with a strong Moravian accent asks.

I’m quickly opening my wallet and handing him my driver license. My NSW gold driver license. They both look at it with a kind of amazement. Their disbelief transforms into few stuttering words after a while.

— You, you speak Czech? — the Moravian one asks.

— Yo — I get myself to answer, not very convincing, trying to hide my delight seeing their astonishment. They obviously weren’t ready for such a treat.

— That’s a 2000 crowns fine, sir. You have money to pay? – Moravian tries to get things back on track.

— Nah — I say in even less convincing broken Czech. There’s no cars around at this hour and the whole episode looks quite bizarre. Yet I’m probably the only one realising the truth.

Now they’re stuck. It’s well after midnight and they don’t look they want to put down the report to fine somebody who crossed the deserted street, ignoring traffic lights. Moravian sighs. The other one just looks at me puzzled. Moravian hands me my ID back and tells me to be careful.

I’m crossing the street again. In the middle of the road, I look up to check the lights — and it’s a bloody red again! Turning back, I see those two standing in awe. I can’t help myself now, I burst out laughing and return.

They shake their heads — but hey, they’re laughing, too.